I’ve rewrote this so many times lol. This year so far has been one of the hardest years for me. Depression was added to my life. Which was not a help at all obviously. I had a hard time making friends at school and my grades were never what I wanted them to be. And I dealt with issues from my past that I should’ve let go many, many years ago.
But I couldn’t understand them, so I was still hanging onto them, trying to figure them out. But all along they were hurting me. I went to the places that I knew I would be, I guess, accepted and understood. Home and church. But as it turned out, it was neither of those places.
I thought people were gonna be there for me when they saw me at my lowest. They weren’t. They were only there when they needed something from me. But as soon as I was struggling and trying to find help, there was none. This took a HUGE toll on me and everyone saw it. But it felt like no one was trying to understand. I caused a lot of chaos in my family. I was literally at rock bottom.
I felt like I had no one because they would tell me that they were there for me, but the actions that were shown spoke a totally different message. I didn’t know where to turn. So I remember my mom saying, when it felt like there was no hope, “turn to God.” So I did, and I figured out that He took everything away from me because I was depending on people and things to SO much. But I never once went to Him and depended on Him.
So this summer, I am doing just that. Depending on Him. And there has never been a better decision I’ve made than this. I was raised in the church and I drifted off into the secular world. But He pulled me back because He has a greater purpose for my life. People don’t understand it. But it’s not for you to understand.
I’m so grateful that He cared enough to snatch me back. He gave me a second chance. This is my story. Yeah there’s more… But I’m just here to say that if you feel like you’re hitting rock bottom and there’s nothing there… He’s there. So try Him. ❤
Link to this blog @ 2eb.ch/cblog0726